There is great need for a sarcasm font.
Bad decisions make good stories.
You never know when it will strike, but there comes a moment at work when you know that you just aren't going to do anything productive for the rest of the day.
If every cast member in a TV show is good-looking, it's not worth watching.
Everyone you meet is better than you at something.
One cruel remark can wound someone for life.
Most of what children learn from adults isn't taught on purpose.
The fewer possessions you have, the more those you have will mean to you.
Few things feel worse than that moment during an argument when you realize you're wrong.
Obituaries would be more interesting if they told you how the person died.
By using a bad picture of yourself on a column, you can generally guarantee you'll be complimented by those who meet you in person.
Another way to generate compliments is if you're going to lie about your age, give an age that's quite a bit older than you actually are.
Managing one's wants is the most powerful skill a person can learn.
Those who complain the most generally accomplish the least.
Wishing things were different is a great way to torture yourself. Especially if you wish for things you can only buy on installment plans.
Aging happens fastest to those who lose their lust for improving, who give up on their dreams, and who cease being curious.
Remember -- you're only young once. But you can always be immature.
Reach Karin Fuller at karinful...@gmail.com.
CHARLESTON, W.Va. -- I was reminded recently of a scene from "Roseanne," where Roseanne asks her mother how old she feels.
Her mother answers, "I'm 63 years old."
Roseanne argues that she knows her mother's age, but wonders how old she feels. Her mom says, "Sixty-three."
Roseanne keeps pushing her.
"What do you want me to say?" her mother asks, sounding exasperated.
Roseanne says, "That you feel 16, or 24, or 35. Just anything but 63."
Something about that scene caused it to stick with me, even though at the time the show aired, I was in my late 20s or early 30s. Years from genuinely bemoaning this business of aging.
I'm about to turn 46. And if someone were to ask, I feel 46.
Lately, I've been spending many of my weekends and evening hours with either a hammer or a paintbrush in my hand. Come the next morning, I feel the effects. Rubbery arm. Sore wrist. Achy shoulder. Nothing major. More like walking with a tiny pebble in your shoe.
That's how my 40s have been. Like walking with a pebble in my shoe.
I feel a kinship with battery-operated devices that have accidentally been left on for hours and with garments whose colors have faded from repeated washings.
To hear of a perfectly good car getting traded in for a new and flashier model feels somehow threatening on a personal level.
That's what the 40s have felt like to me. Faded, nubby, a little bit drained. But they've also felt softened and comfortable. Starting to relax and loosen in the places that have too long been tense.
Aging: It beats the alternative.
A few months back, a friend e-mailed a list she'd found called "Basic Truths" that I saved and have been adding to. Since part of this aging business has to do with acquiring and sharing wisdom, it seems appropriate to share a few morsels of knowledge.
The cheapest and the most-expensive models are both usually bad deals.Getting to the point quickly is always appreciated.Part of a best friend's job should be to immediately clear your computer history if you die.There is great need for a sarcasm font.Bad decisions make good stories.You never know when it will strike, but there comes a moment at work when you know that you just aren't going to do anything productive for the rest of the day.If every cast member in a TV show is good-looking, it's not worth watching.Everyone you meet is better than you at something.One cruel remark can wound someone for life.Most of what children learn from adults isn't taught on purpose.The fewer possessions you have, the more those you have will mean to you.Few things feel worse than that moment during an argument when you realize you're wrong.Obituaries would be more interesting if they told you how the person died.By using a bad picture of yourself on a column, you can generally guarantee you'll be complimented by those who meet you in person.Another way to generate compliments is if you're going to lie about your age, give an age that's quite a bit older than you actually are.Managing one's wants is the most powerful skill a person can learn.Those who complain the most generally accomplish the least.Wishing things were different is a great way to torture yourself. Especially if you wish for things you can only buy on installment plans.Aging happens fastest to those who lose their lust for improving, who give up on their dreams, and who cease being curious.Remember -- you're only young once. But you can always be immature.
Reach Karin Fuller at karinful...@gmail.com.
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