CHARLESTON, W.Va. -- It was early Thanksgiving week when my friend Sue stopped by the grocery store on her way home from work. She'd been having an especially good day and was in an upbeat mood when she reached the part of the store's meat section where the roasts are kept.
Three women, who were shopping together, had parked their cart by the roasts and were examining them one at a time, trying to determine which was best.
"I didn't want to interrupt," Sue said, "So I kept shopping in that area and got the other things I needed. When I went back for a roast, the women were still debating which one to buy, so I said, 'Excuse me a second,' and reached around and randomly grabbed a roast from the cooler and put it in my cart."
A few minutes later, as Sue was finishing her shopping, she stepped away from her cart just long enough for one of the three women to reach into Sue's buggy and snatch the roast. Sue turned back just in time to see the woman putting the roast in her own cart and swaggering cockily away. While Sue stood dumbfounded.
"I wanted to say something," she said. "But what do you say to something like that?"
Instead, she went back to the meat section thinking she'd just get a different roast, but all the roasts were now gone.
"My good mood was shot," Sue said. "All I could do was come up with one thing after another that I wish I'd said, instead of just standing there and letting that woman walk off with my roast."
Even the most clever comeback probably wouldn't have made her feel any better.
"The way people act can be so discouraging," Sue said.
CHARLESTON, W.Va. -- It was early Thanksgiving week when my friend Sue stopped by the grocery store on her way home from work. She'd been having an especially good day and was in an upbeat mood when she reached the part of the store's meat section where the roasts are kept.
Three women, who were shopping together, had parked their cart by the roasts and were examining them one at a time, trying to determine which was best.
"I didn't want to interrupt," Sue said, "So I kept shopping in that area and got the other things I needed. When I went back for a roast, the women were still debating which one to buy, so I said, 'Excuse me a second,' and reached around and randomly grabbed a roast from the cooler and put it in my cart."
A few minutes later, as Sue was finishing her shopping, she stepped away from her cart just long enough for one of the three women to reach into Sue's buggy and snatch the roast. Sue turned back just in time to see the woman putting the roast in her own cart and swaggering cockily away. While Sue stood dumbfounded.
"I wanted to say something," she said. "But what do you say to something like that?"
Instead, she went back to the meat section thinking she'd just get a different roast, but all the roasts were now gone.
"My good mood was shot," Sue said. "All I could do was come up with one thing after another that I wish I'd said, instead of just standing there and letting that woman walk off with my roast."
Even the most clever comeback probably wouldn't have made her feel any better.
"The way people act can be so discouraging," Sue said.
It's easy to feel that way sometimes, especially with news stories about a woman dismembering her stepdaughter; about high school students being held hostage; about audience members at a speech by Bill Nye the Science Guy choosing to take pictures rather than help when he collapsed.
But then I remembered part of an interview I heard last week with former monk Thupten Jinpa. Jinpa, the Dalai Lama's chief English translator, was talking about what happens when ancient tradition meets the modern world.
When he was asked about the media and sensational news stories, he said the Dalai Lama believes that acts of affection, of love and caring, don't make headlines because people are essentially good, so we take goodness for granted. We expect those types of behavior -- being decent toward each other -- to be normal.
"Killing and violence make headlines because we don't expect normal people to behave in that manner. When they do, we are shocked," said Jinpa. "But we let ourselves be driven by headline news, and the sad byproduct of that is that people become cynical, thinking, 'Oh, we're such a horrible species.'"
For every sad story we read about thieves making off with the presents under some family's tree, there are good people -- often total strangers -- who will materialize to make certain the victimized family still enjoys a good Christmas.
For every church that's vandalized, there's a volunteer crew organizing to rebuild.
For every roast swiped from a cart, there's a kindhearted person like Sue, who allows it to be taken without stooping to that woman's level.
The public often doesn't learn about the good that results after bad because those stories aren't newsworthy. There needs to be a sensational element for it to be news, and good people doing good deeds -- that's still normal.
I used to think "normal" was just another cycle on the washing machine, but I'm determined to try and do as Thupten Jinpa suggested: Watch for signs of people behaving normally, and appreciate those times when it shows.
Reach Karin Fuller at karinful...@gmail.com.
Get Connected