"Only in math problems can you buy 60 cantaloupes and no one asks what the heck is wrong with you."
"He said his ex was the craziest woman he ever met. I said, 'Challenge accepted.'"
"If you've never jumped from one couch to another to avoid the lava, you've never had a childhood."
"There are no limits to what you can accomplish if you are supposed to be doing something else."
"Holding on to anger is like drinking poison and expecting the other person to die."
"Dear Life. When I said, 'Life could not get any worse,' it was not a challenge."
"You can't always control who walks into your life, but you can control which window you throw them out of."
"I've had a horribly busy day converting oxygen into carbon dioxide."
"Sarcasm: The ability to insult idiots without them realizing it."
"You made me laugh so hard tears ran down my leg."
"I don't want to make anyone jealous, but I can still fit into the earrings I wore in high school."
Hopefully, my schedule should return to normal in another week or two. But until then, I'll try to be creative even if I'm still thoroughly exhaustipated.
Which means I'm simply too tired to give a crap.
Reach Karin Fuller at karinful...@gmail.com.