CHARLESTON, W.Va. -- Wayne LaPierre succeeded, if his purpose was to evoke Marlon Brando's psychotic Col. Kurtz in the film "Apocalypse Now." But the dead of Newtown deserved better than the detached creep-a-palooza by the National Rifle Association leader.

In a jaw-dropping monologue (questions were not permitted) before hordes of reporters, LaPierre blankly blamed the murders on the news media, the movie and video game industries, the president and anything else with a pulse -- except himself and his primary constituency, the manufacturers of guns and ammunition.

Conveniently, LaPierre neglected to mention that since 2005 his NRA has taken more than $20 million from the likes of Beretta, Glock, Smith & Wesson and a dozen more, for whom he lobbies the congress ... so that it will ease gun restrictions ... so that more guns and ammo will be purchased ... so that these companies will reap huge profits and in turn will contribute more cash to the NRA ... which pays LaPierre $1.4 million annually. You've heard of the circle of life. Meet the cycle of death.

LaPierre's smarm-a-thon was long on false concern for children, and devoid of mention of countries like Finland, Australia, Britain and Spain, where guns rarely are available, and in which there are fewer than a hundred shooting deaths per year. In the U.S., there are roughly 10,000.

Evidently, LaPierre lost the note card on which he had written that 74 percent of NRA members support closing the gun show loophole. He made no mention of huge majorities of Americans who support limits on the number of rounds in a clip, who favor renewal of the assault weapons ban, and who have concluded that LaPierre no longer represents dues paying members of the NRA.

Elsewhere, Texas Gov. Rick "Oops!" Perry called for teachers to be armed. Virginia Gov. Bob, "vaginal probe" MacDonald implied the same, as have others.

More guns in our schools! What could possibly go wrong?

To find out, I asked my son Daniel about the wisdom of arming teachers. Daniel is a veteran policeman and former Marine who presently serves as St. Albans High School's in-house officer. His reaction to arming teachers? "Ridiculous." With several hypothetical scenarios, which to be clear have not occurred at SAHS, Officer Wyatt made his point:

* A teacher keeps her gun in a desk drawer, which she forgets to lock. The weapon is now available to a sharp-eyed student with mental health issues.

* A 30-something female teacher pulls her gun in hopes that she may subdue an enraged student. But she is disarmed by the young man who is half her age and twice her size. He is armed and dangerous.

* A gunman enters a school with a single weapon. He kills the teacher who confronts him. He now has two loaded weapons with which to double-down on murder.

* The police rush to a school in response to a report of a shooter. Upon entering, they are unable to differentiate the shooter from armed teachers. An individual darts toward an officer. In the confusion, police kill him. He was a teacher.

* As an armed teacher intervenes in a hallway fight between two students, his gun is taken by one of the students. A fistfight becomes a murder.

Daniel generated those scenarios in a couple of minutes, and easily could have provided many more, he said. "The more guns, the worse the situation," he added. So, I asked, what is a teacher's best course of action? "Get away and call the police."

After Newtown, every member of the NRA will be called on by the spirit of a child who wants to know, "Did I die in vain?"

Dr. Wyatt is a Gazette contributing columnist and Marshall University professor.