On the bright side, this offers a slither of hope for, say, Chiefs or Raiders fans.
In other less sobering NFL news ...
At No. 5 is our old, mustachioed friend, the Eagles' Andy Reid, who deserves better. At No. 4 is the Chargers' Norv Turner himself - the all-time leader in Reverse COY countdown appearances - who, at this point, couldn't coach a cow to moo. At No. 3 is the Saints' Sean Payton, who oversaw his team's collapse from a Best Buy flat-screen showroom somewhere in southeastern Louisiana. At No. 2 is the Jets' Rex Ryan, who acts like the second coming of General Patton and leads like the second coming of "F Troop."
And at No. 1? If you take a team from 10-6 to 4-11 and you throw a challenge flag even though you know throwing it will wipe away any replay review, that's professional malpractice, which makes the Lions' Jim Schwartz the Reverse Coach of the Year.
Number of starting quarterbacks the Colts have gone through before finding replacement for Peyton Manning, who left team after 2011 season: 1 (Andrew Luck).
Ask The Slouch
Q. Were the Blue-Gray or North-South college football games ever canceled during the Civil War? (Todd Deane; Halfmoon, N.Y.)
A. I want to say yes, but watching "Lincoln," I could've sworn I heard Lee Corso on one of the White House TVs in the background.
Q. How can Maryland pay $52 million to leave the ACC when it can't afford seven sports it cut in June? (W. Wolf; Dagsboro, Del.)
A. Maryland math.
Q. The Mayans were full of it, no? (Aaron Epstein; Spokane, Wash.)
A. Prognostication is an art, not a science.
Q. Do you find people are asking you questions just for the $1.25 so they can avert their own fiscal cliff? (Mark Pattison; Washington, D.C.)
A. Pay the man quickly, Shirley.
You, too, can enter the $1.25 Ask The Slouch Cash Giveaway. Just e-mail asktheslo...@aol.com and, if your question is used, you win $1.25 in cash!