Meanwhile, the Pujols/Hamilton Angels just traded Wells to save on payroll, but they still will provide $29 million of the $42 million he's owed over the next two seasons. Yet somehow the Angels are paying second-year sensation Mike Trout only $510,000. Heck, A-Rod earns that much while sitting in the whirlpool for 30 minutes.
Which brings us back to the Yankees, the supposed new fiscal conservatives on the block. By 2014, they want the payroll under $189 million so they don't have to pay the luxury tax anymore.
The new New York Yankees would never switch to George Costanza's cotton uniforms.
These Yankees have an austerity program: Cut player costs (eventually), raise parking fees.
So it's now $35 to park at Yankee Stadium. At least that gives the Dodgers another number to shoot for.
Ask The Slouch
Q. Charles Barkley once admitted to not having actually read his own autobiography. Now, he is pitching CDW's network virtualization services on TV. Does anyone on the planet think that Barkley has even the faintest clue as to what "network virtualization" is? (M.S. Winston; Berwyn Heights, Md.)
A. No, but I'd bet he could explain "run-to-the-bank virtualization" to anyone.
Q. MLB has banned the third-to-first fake pickoff move, deeming it "detrimental to the game of baseball." Shouldn't they also take a look at Tim McCarver's broadcasting career? (J.B. Koch; Waukesha, Wis.)
A. To be fair, McCarver did Sports Nation a great service last week, announcing this would be his last season on Fox baseball.
Q. Will Duke players' draft stock drop now that the NBA has instituted an anti-flopping policy? (Mike Schweich; Glenelg, Md.)
A. Pay the man, Shirley.
You, too, can enter the $1.25 Ask The Slouch Cash Giveaway. Just e-mail asktheslo...@aol.com and, if your question is used, you win $1.25 in cash!