8:31: Percy Harvin's 87-yard kickoff return makes it 29-0. I just might switch to "Shark Tank" on ABC.
8:33: This game is starting to mirror the run-up to my senior prom, when 17 consecutive girls turned me down, with a good deal of certainty and hostility.
8:38: Eric Decker seems to be auditioning for a remake of "The Invisible Man."
8:55: Down 29-0, Troy Aikman says of Broncos: "You do the math, and they need four touchdowns and three two-point conversions." Uh, that's some bad math.
9:04: Bob Dylan for Chrysler? What's next, Franz Kafka for Skittles?
9:22: If any Seahawk ever wins a Golden Globe, they'll celebrate so long the music will strike up before they ever get to the stage.
9:49: Still throwing the ball with two minutes left, Pete Carroll is thinking BCS standings.
9:50: I love that Budweiser commercial, but please note that neither the puppy nor the Clydesdale touches that swill.
9:54: For what it's worth, Peyton Manning might also be the greatest regular-season horseshoes player of all time.
9:55: I have a feeling I'm going to wake up tomorrow and Fox Sports 1 will be replaced on my cable system by Richard Sherman 1.
Ask The Slouch
Q. I'm thinking of making a last-minute impulse trip to the Winter Olympics. Any thoughts or tips? (Jonathan Cohen; Redondo Beach, Calif.)
A. The Sochi Applebee's - right off Kurotny Prospekt, near the marina - might be the best Applebee's anywhere.
Q. What do you think is the first thing David Stern did after retiring as NBA commissioner Saturday? (Don Matheson; Beaumont, Tex.)
A. Cancel his WNBA League Pass subscription.
Q. In your divorces, were any of your wives hit with a bucket of Gatorade? (Jim Boswell; Bowie, Md.)
A. The first one actually had the Gatorade spiked with Dom Perignon.
Q. I just saw a graphic on ESPN titled "Duke Foul Trouble." Is this sports television history? (William Murray; Chicago)
A. No, that is fantasy.
Q. In refusing to talk to the media, do you think Marshawn Lynch was exercising his constitutional rights under the First Amendment or the Fifth Amendment? (Jeff Morris; Spokane, Wash.)
A. Pay the man, Shirley.
You, too, can enter the $1.25 Ask The Slouch Cash Giveaway. Just e-mail asktheslo...@aol.com and, if your question is used, you win $1.25 in cash!