Let's dress better and treat everyone better.
Let's keep an eye on any friends or family with a gambling problem.
Let's understand that it's just a game - granted, a wonderful, complex, multi-skillset game - and stop treating it like nuclear science; nobody just split the atom here, somebody just was smart enough to figure out that Seat 8 three-bet with 7-6 off-suit.
Let's leave the card room once in a while to catch a sunset.
Let's stop accosting people in bathrooms with bad-beat stories.
And let's wash our hands before running back to the felt; trust me, we all can afford to miss a hand or two.
Ask The Slouch
Q. Ted Stevens, Barry Bonds, John Edwards, Roger Clemens - when's the Department of Justice going to record a 'W'? (Stephen Holt; Alexandria, Va.)
A. Shockingly, the Justice Department has become the Washington Generals of the legal system. Heck, those fellas couldn't convict Benedict Arnold of treason.
Q. Do you feel good jinxing the Thunder last week, with your self-congratulatory pat-on-the-back for picking them to win the NBA title? (J.P. Harris; Indianapolis)
A. It reminded me of when I called all my friends in 1948 to tell them Dewey had beaten Truman.
Q. Who do you like in the Tour de France? (Rick Schwartz; Cleveland)
A. The bottled-water vendors.
(Note to Readers: Shirley is on a paid leave of absence.)
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